IAM839- Founder Uses Her Frame of Mind Coaching Process to Help Leaders

Intro 0:02
Do you want to learn effective ways to build relationships, generate sales and grow your business from successful entrepreneurs, startups and CEOs without listening to a long, long, long interview? If so, you've come to the right place, Gresham Harkless values your time and is ready to share with you precisely the information you are in search of. This is the I am CEO podcast.

Gresham Harkless 0:29
Hello, hello. Hello, this is Gresh from the I am CEO podcast and I have a very special guest on the show today of Kim as a frame of mind coaching Kim, it's awesome. have you on the show?

Kim Ades 0:38
I am thrilled to be here you have no idea. I'm so excited.

Gresham Harkless 0:42
No problem. Super excited to have you on as well. And you're doing so many phenomenal things. I wanted to read a little bit more about Kim so you can hear about some of those awesome things that she's doing. And Kim is the president and founder of frame of mind coaching and journal engine software. recognized as an expert in the area of thought mastery and mental toughness. Kim uses her unique philosophy and quirky coaching style to help business owners and leaders identify their personal blind spots and shift their thinking in order to yield extraordinary results. Author speaker entrepreneur coach mama five Kim's claim to fame is teaching her powerful frame of mind coaching process to leaders, parents and influencers worldwide. Kim, are you ready to speak to the imcl? community?

Kim Ades 1:22
I am ready.

Gresham Harkless 1:23
Awesome. Let's do it. And to kick everything off, I wanted to kind of rewind the clock a little bit on all the accomplishments that you have and hear how you got started. Can you take us through your SEO story when it started with all the awesome things were going on?

Kim Ades 1:35
Sure. So I'm a bit of a serial entrepreneur, you could say ever since I was a kid, you know, I was that kid who went to the beach in Cape Cod, with my family and all the friends and I used to sell massages on the beach for $2 a pop 10 minutes $2. At the at the time, it was like raking it in right. And as I got older, I kept on being really seriously interested in businesses. The next business I owned I was like 20 something years old. And I owned a balloon business. And we used to do balloon decorating for people's parties and weddings and things like that. The next business was a business called upward motion. And we used to build simulation based assessments to help companies make better hiring decisions. And that really, really made a big impact on me in terms of bringing me to where I am now. Because what we ended up doing was testing people to figure out who would be a top performer in any given industry in any given role. So we're looking at their IQ, we're looking at their personality traits, we're looking at their skill sets, we're looking at everything. And there was one key differentiator of top performance that kept surfacing over and above all other characteristics. And that was if a person had a high degree of emotional resilience, they would be much more likely to succeed. And so fast forward, I ended up selling the shares of that business many years ago. And I got hired by coaching company right after that. And I lasted with them for about eight and a half, nine months, because I'm really not designed to work for other people. Like you could relate to that. And, and, but in that time period, I got an opportunity to observe how other people do coaching. And I thought to myself, I think they're doing it wrong. I think there's a better way, I think they're missing the boat. And so that's when I decided to start framing my coaching, and really bring forward a different approach a different philosophy, a different style of coaching to the table. So here we are now 16 years later. And I have a team of coaches in Canada and the US. And we certify people in what I call the frame of mind coaching process or process for Americans.

Gresham Harkless 3:50
Yeah, no, I absolutely love that. And I almost wonder if you would definitely agree with this. I always say I'm a strong believer in binary that sometimes you have to experience the bad dude to know the good and it kind of sounds like correct me if I'm wrong. By having that experience where you were working in that business and made you understand that this is something that's not quite hitting the market can be a lot better. Had you not experienced that maybe we wouldn't be here talking about at least this business now.

Kim Ades 4:14
Well, I'm I agree with you. And I'm a big believer that all experiences lead to here. Right? So even though you think the experience was irrelevant, or a waste of time, or exhausting, or a loss, a failure, I don't look at things that way. I think that they all contribute to the here and now. And so, you know, I look back at it and think that even though it was actually a short period of time in the grand scheme of my career, it was very useful for me to experience that contrast to help me identify what I think it should be instead.

Gresham Harkless 4:46
Yeah, absolutely. I love that. And you know, Steve Jobs has his commencement speech where he says sometimes you can't understand how things then alignment, you're looking backwards and the dots start to connect. So I absolutely love that you've been able to kind of create this business so I know we touched on it a little bit, could you take us through a little bit more on what that better way the better mousetrap so to speak is and how exactly you're serving the clients you work with.

Kim Ades 5:07
So when I worked for this company, what they did was they worked with business owners, and they help them create a business plan. Sounds like a good idea, right? So I help you create a business plan. And in that credit business plan, we're gonna break that down into manageable components, again, sounds pretty reasonable. And as a coach, what I'm going to do is I'm going to hold you accountable to making sure that you get all the things done in order to reach your goals. Again, sounds perfectly reasonable, right? Except in my mind, I thought, you know, what people know how to create business plans. That's not the issue, the issue is that they don't do what's on the plan. Right, something's getting in the way they don't execute. And I'm interested in why they don't execute. It's not about the plan creation. That's the big issue. It's about why don't they get the things done that they know will lead to their goals? What's stopping them? what's getting in their way? And that's where I was coming from, I didn't think that I should have to hold other people accountable. Like I have five kids as it is, do I need more people to hold accountable? I thought that's not fun. And not to mention, I'm not the kind of person who likes to be accountable to others. Right? That that just didn't feel good to me. And I imagine that a lot of leaders, especially entrepreneurs, who are extremely driven, they don't want to answer to people. That's why they run their own businesses, right. So there's a funny problem, right? If they're independently minded, and they want to do their own things, and they have these goals that they want to achieve, but still something stopping them from reaching those goals. That's the problem I wanted to solve. And so what I figured out was that the thing that was stopping them from achieving their goals was not their abilities, or their skill sets or their experiences. But it was the thinking that they had about these problems about themselves, more specifically, the beliefs they had that were standing in the way of their success. And that's all completely 100% connected to emotional resilience. And so I thought to myself, if I could help people improve their emotional resilience, if I could help people identify the beliefs that were preventing them from taking those steps, and kind of clearing the pathway. So imagine you're on a runway, and there's all these obstacles in your way. And I clear the pathway now you can take off. And so my job wasn't so much to hold people accountable and create plans for them. But to remove those things, those barriers that they weren't even aware of, that were in their way. And so that's how frame of mind coaching came into being

Gresham Harkless 7:37
nice. I absolutely love that. And I think that, you know, definitely a lot of people that are listening to this for Crowley resonates with them, as you were talking about, you know, having that entrepreneurial spirit not wanting to answer to people. And sometimes there's that, I guess that that tension, sometimes that you have with, you know, having to you know, listen to those rules, or listen, the way that things are done, when in reality, that's not really what is stopping the execution. It's those blockages, those things that we may not be aware of. And I think that it sounds very empowering for me. And I imagine that you probably get the same kind of response from clients as well.

Kim Ades 8:09
Well, here's the thing as humans, just because we're human, we all have blind spots. And those blind spots really trip us up. A problem is because their blind spots, we don't understand them, we can't see them at all. We feel his frustration, disappointment, anger, confusion, sometimes we have the emotional reaction to experiencing the blind spot, but because we can't see it, we don't know how to deal with it. We don't know how to move it out of the way. And that's where coaching comes into play. Because, you know, again, I have a team of coaches, but I can clearly easily quickly see some somebody's blind spots. And so what does that do? It accelerates a person's progress. Right? When you're working with someone who has experience and seeing what typically trips people up. What happens on the other end is like, oh, wow, I didn't see that. Let's move through it quickly. And so I know that leaders like speed, I like speed, too. I want to help them move fast.

Gresham Harkless 9:04
Yeah, absolutely. One of the best ways to get there fast is to tap into the expertise of others, the experience of others, and you being able to kind of have that niche. And the ability to be able to see that that superpower so to speak, allows the people that work with you that really valuable opportunity to do that. So would you consider that to be your secret sauce, or the thing you feel kind of sets you apart is that ability to kind of see that and help people to kind of move those things out of the way so that they can execute.

Kim Ades 9:28
So I would say to you that I had just have strong instincts. Yes. However, what ended up happening was once I started coaching people, the people I coach said, How do you do that? Like, what is it that you're doing? Exactly? Can you teach me? And again, look, looking back, you know, 1516 years ago, I'm like, I don't know, I'm just doing it. But then they pushed me to really figure out what the heck I was doing, how I was doing and why I was driving the results that we were getting with our clients. And it turned out that there's a logic to this, that there's a framework that there's a process That I now teach other leaders who are interested in learning how to be more effective leaders by learning how to coach their team members. So now we have a certification process. So you know, yes, perhaps the secret sauces just, you know, I have a strong sense for how to move people to a better place. But beyond that, I think it's taking that concept when it was just a concept when it was intangible, and making it tangible. So now somebody says, like, what really makes you different from all other coaching programs? I say it's four things, right? It's the process that we use for coaching. It's the philosophy in our approach. It's our platform that we use, and it's the people. So every single one of our coaches started off by being a client first. They went through coaching, they had an extraordinary experience. And then they said, How do I learn how to do this? That was unreal? How do I learn how to become a coach, because I see the value. And so they went through, they have literally invested time and money to get certified to become experts at coaching.

Gresham Harkless 11:07
Absolutely. And so I wanted to switch gears a little bit. And I want to ask you for what I call a CEO hack. So this could be like an app or book or a habit that you have. But what's something that makes you more effective and efficient?

Kim Ades 11:19
Hands down, I do this myself, but I tell every single client of mine, like it's part of our process. journaling provides insight that is accessible by no other means. So when you journal, you're writing down what you think what you believe what your perspectives are. And in that process, you're able to see some of what you can't see otherwise.

Gresham Harkless 11:43
Absolutely love that hacking. And I want to ask you now for what I call a CEO, nugget. And this could be a word of wisdom or a piece of advice, it might be something you would tell a client or you hacked into a time machine, you might tell your younger self.

Kim Ades 11:55
Okay, so here's what I'm going to do. And you can tell me if I'm allowed to do it, but I'm going to give your audience and exercises that cool. Go for it. Okay, so we talked about journaling, here's your journaling assignment for the day. Okay. So take grab a piece of paper and a pen, write this down. Question number one, what do you really, really want more than anything? Now, there are two really is there on purpose, not just because I'm exuberant and enthusiastic, but because I want you to think about what you truly deeply want, not something that is expected of you not something that other people want for you, not what your parents have always thought you should have? Or do or be, but what is it that you truly deeply want? Question number two, write this down. So what's stopping me from having it? what's getting in the way, and write down all the reasons, and then go back and read what you've written, read what you want, make sure that is what you want. Make sure that it's truly what you want, not just the surface level what you want. And then look at all the reasons and start to understand that the reasons that you wrote down, or the seed or the tipping point of your beliefs. And that's actually what is getting in your way. Now, for those of you who are super bold, send me your responses. And I will personally review them with you. And my email address is Kim at frame of mind coaching calm, but only if you're bold.

Gresham Harkless 13:16
Awesome, awesome. Awesome. So now to ask you my absolute favorite question, which is a definition of what it means to be a CEO. And we're hoping to have different clinical CEOs on the show. So Kim, what does being a CEO mean to you?

Kim Ades 13:26
I mean, for me, being a CEO means getting the chance to design a place, a system, a product, a service, a concept, that is a complete reflection of my values, my priorities, my passions. And, and having it trickled down to the people that serve with me and the people we serve.

Gresham Harkless 13:49
I definitely appreciate that. And I appreciate your time even more. What I wanted to do is pass you the mic so to speak, just to see if there's anything additional you can let our readers and listeners know. And of course, how basically you don't have you listen to your awesome podcast and find out all the awesome things at work.

Kim Ades 14:02
Do they know that you are a guest on my awesome?

Gresham Harkless 14:03
They will?

Kim Ades 14:06
Um, final words is this, okay? So very often, as leaders, there are things we get frustrated with, right? Like their goals, we want to reach that we're not really reaching or there are people that work for us that aren't necessarily producing or we have things that we want to do that we don't have time to get to whatever it is, when you feel a sense of frustration, annoyance, impatience, disappointment, whatever that negative feeling is typically what leaders do is they say, Okay, well, whatever I'm doing now isn't working, I got to go do something different. I got to jump into action. And what I would suggest, again, big concept is don't jump to action. Slow down for a minute before you go and change your action. Ask yourself what do I believe to be true about this problem, the situation this person, this circumstance, and write it down? And what you will notice is that a lot of what you believe If it is actually not entirely true, we invent a lot of things. And those inventions cause us to feel frustrated, impatient, disappointed. And so before taking action, make sure to realign your beliefs with the goals you have. Because if you try to take action from your existing set of beliefs, what happens is you bump into the same frustrations, disappointments, anger down the road. And so don't take action from this thinking spot. Change your thinking spot, look at your beliefs, challenge them, and then take action. That's my greatest piece of advice.

Gresham Harkless 15:42
Awesome, awesome. Awesome. I definitely appreciate that. And for people that want to get a hold of you, what's the best way for them to do that? Yeah, so

Kim Ades 15:47
two things go to frame of mind coaching COMM And look it up. We have a podcast. We have all kinds of cool things on the website. But again, to reach me, it's Kim at frame of mind coaching calm, and I am very responsive, send me an email, I'd be happy to chat.

Gresham Harkless 16:02
Awesome, awesome, awesome. And we would definitely have those links and information in the show notes. And as Kim said, I've been a guest on the podcast so I got some really phenomenal coaching and some really phenomenal opportunity to kind of learn from the best. How I can definitely kind of level up and everything that I'm doing so truly appreciate you can for all you're doing and in time you took with us today and I hope you have a phenomenal day.

Outro 16:21
Thank you for listening to the IMC o podcast powered by Blue 16 Media Tune in next time and visit us at I am ceo.co I am CEO is not just a phrase, it's a community. Be sure to follow us on social media and subscribe to our podcast on iTunes, Google Play and everywhere you listen to podcasts, subscribe and leave us a five star rating grab CEO gear at WWW dot CEO gear.co This has been the mF CEO podcast with Gresham Harkless. Thank you for listening.