IAM2612 – CEO Offers Mother-daughter Relationship Consultation and Speaking Services

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Michelle Deering Teaser 00:00
I'm all about moms. That's what Curative Connections is. And to put it succinctly, I help moms and daughters get clarity and calm so that they can be in touch with themselves, be more intentional about connecting with each other in their relationship.

And I do that through a variety of things, whether it's speaking and doing motivational speaking or groups or workshops, for companies, organizations, mom groups. I service them that way.

Intro 00:31
Are you ready to hear business stories and learn effective ways to build relationships, generate sales, and level up your business from awesome CEOs, entrepreneurs, and founders without listening to a long, long, long interview?
If so, you've come to the right place. Gresh values your time and is ready to share with you the valuable info you're in search of. This is the I Am CEO Podcast.

Gresham Harkless 00:58
Hello, hello, hello. This is Gresh from the I AM CEO podcast and I have a very special guest on the show today. I have Dr. Michelle Dearing of Curative Connections.

Dr. Michelle, it's awesome to have you on the show.

Michelle Deering 01:10
Thanks for having me.

Gresham Harkless 01:10
Great to be here. No problem. Super excited to have you on and I wanted to read a little bit more about Dr. Michelle so you can hear about all the awesome things that she's doing.

Dr. Michelle is the founder and CEO of Curative Connections, a premier consulting company that offers mother-daughter relationship consultation, sports psychology services, and keynote speaking services.

A graduate of Brown University, Dr. Dearing is a North Carolina and New Jersey state-licensed clinical psychologist and national board-certified sports psychologist.

Her best-selling book, What Mothers Never Tell Their Daughters, Five Keys to Building Trust, Restoring Connection, and Strengthening Relationships, helps mother and daughter connect intentionally and improve relationally with each other.

While she's not working with her clients, she's guest blogging for Parent Magazine or being featured guests on podcasts and radio shows. Michelle enjoys spending time with her husband and twin daughters, playing her Ludwig drum kit, and of course taking boxing lessons.

Dr. Michelle, are you ready to speak to the I AM CEO Community?

Michelle Deering 02:14
I am so pumped and excited to be here. Thanks for having me.

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Gresham Harkless 02:18
No problem, super excited to have you on as well. So I wanted to kick everything off by hearing a little bit more about what I call your CEO story and what led you to start your business.

Michelle Deering 02:28
Yeah, actually, I was thinking about what actually made me want to go out and be an entrepreneur. And my first inkling of that was when I was an admissions officer at a business school of a university in Massachusetts.

And it was the first time that I had some autonomy with my schedule. But the thing that I really enjoyed was actually going out to meet people, hear their personal stories about this life and where they felt stuck, and then developing strategies that were tailored to them to meet their professional goals.

Fast forward, I got licensed. I went through my doctoral program, got licensed, as you read in my bio intro. did some certifications for traa work, and I was working at a university where their emphasis started moving away from being preventive and developmental to being more crisis systems, and it felt really depersonalized for me.

And, you know, as we've gotten to know each other shortly, I'm a personable person and the synergy was just not happening and it began to take a toll on me physically.

So I made the decision in 2010 to found my company, Curative Connections, where I initially started it out as a part-time, you know, private practice therapy company, but then somewhere around.

And my focus at that point was really trying to put the person back in personalized services. And then back in 2012, I decided to just break ties from the university where I was working and just launch out full-time as a consulting company, where I offer, as you mentioned, the speaker services, consultation services, as well as the clinical and sports psychology stuff.

Gresham Harkless 04:17
Nice. I definitely appreciate that. And I appreciate you kind of, especially highlighting, how some of those skills translate into, you know, owning a business.

I think sometimes you forget, like when you start a business that you're not, you're not just starting from a blank slate, you know, you have certain things that, you know, you tap into as far as experience.

And usually one of the big struggles that people have as well too, is that autonomy, because you do have freedom, but you don't really have freedom if you want to stay in business. So you have to be able to kind of manage that time freedom overall.

Michelle Deering 04:47
Exactly. And, and, and yeah, actually,  I didn't realize how, I mean, I've always been an organized person. I set a goal for myself. I work it backwards so that I know the steps I need to take.

and then, you know, expanding to actually running one's own business, , you have to be a consistent, consistently open to learning. And so it's really, you know, made me a jack of all trades, , but a master of a lot of things.

I've mastered a lot of things. And then, you know, just getting out to meet people who may have skills that I don't have and then collaborating with them, which is another thing I like about being a CEO is that I can call the shots as to when it is I'm going to go collaborate with someone and I do it with purpose and intent.

Gresham Harkless 05:36
Yes. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. And like you mentioned, that curiosity is a very big part, you know, and learning not just, you know, from your clients, people that you're working with, but also of people that might be potential strategic partnerships and, and so on and so forth.

So I know I touched on a little bit you did as well. Can you tell us a little bit more about your business and what you're doing to kind of support the clients you're working with?

Michelle Deering 05:56
When I think about, the kind of work I do, I'm all about moms. That's what Curative Connections is. And to put it succinctly, I help moms and daughters get clarity and calm so that they can be in touch with themselves. be more intentional about connecting with each other in their relationship.

And I do that through a variety of things, whether it's, you know, speaking and doing motivational speaking or groups or workshops for companies, organizations, mom groups. I service them that way. That's one part.

The other part has to do with the actual consultation, which is kind of the one-on-one where I'll have moms who have daughters.

Either I'll see both of them at the same time or separately. And then, you know, especially since I am an athlete, I usually get a kick out of really working with those moms who have daughters who are athletes and that's where I pull in the clinical side.

So I have different parts of my brain and what's nice about being a CEO is that I get to access all of that stuff.

Gresham Harkless 07:02
Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And you get to, , you know, really take your expertise in those years that you put in to, to build that expertise and be able to help out others. and in a lot of different ways, which is definitely, you know, pretty cool to be able to do.

And now I wanted to ask you for what I call your secret sauce, and this could be for you or your organization, but what do you feel kind of sets you apart and makes you unique?

Michelle Deering 07:24
Well, what makes me unique is that You know, as I said, I'm all about moms, but I'm really about helping moms get steady with who they are as individuals, because they end up perpetuating any unsteadiness.

And it just goes on generationally. And so what I'm trying to do is you'll see a lot of times where folks who come out with self-help books or everyone has their place, but there are people who come out with self-help books and they're just kind of putting strategies or tactics on top of what I call considered to be underlying wounds and hurts and issues.

And what I'm doing is I'm actually, in a very engaging, friendly way that's very nonjudgmental, really just helping women, moms in particular, just get at what it is that's underneath that so that they can make the change there. And then that will then affect their actions. So I'm really about getting under the surface with folks.

Gresham Harkless 08:28
I definitely appreciate that because I think a lot of times whenever you're dealing with something, trying to fix something, trying to change something, if you ignore those underlying foundational sometimes, I don't want to call them issues, but things that may have happened, then it doesn't matter how perfect a plan you have or how great that self-help book is.

If you haven't dealt with that foundational principle, then it's hard to kind of get past that. So I appreciate you for doing that deep dive as we talked about offline.

Michelle Deering 08:58
That's why I'm looking forward to that. Your members will actually really enjoy that, whatever it is we end up talking about.

Gresham Harkless 09:04
Yeah, absolutely. I definitely think so. So I appreciate you for sharing that and also for doing that as well. I wanted to switch gears a little bit and I wanted to ask you for what I call a CEO hack.

And this might be an Apple book or a habit that you have, but it's something that makes you more effective and efficient.

Michelle Deering 09:22
Well, my CEO hack is based on something that I was told early in my clinical training. My supervisor said, you know, you as a psychologist are your tool. It's not like I can work on an instrent or something, but I bring me. to my work.

I think that's true for everyone. We are individuals before we are whatever our profession is. And so with that in mind, I think it's my hack is that for a person to actually start their day off with some quiet time, to actually be still with themselves in their mind and in their heart, and then just notice whatever it is they're noticing that morning.

Gresham Harkless 10:05
Yeah, no, I love that. And especially because in kind of like what you, you know, talked about how you, you know, help out the clients that you're working with, it's just getting that self-awareness and understanding what that is.
But I always try to remind myself that, you know, to put your oxygen mask on first, which is not to mean that you don't give, it's just to mean that you're able to take care of yourself. You're in a place that you can give even more than maybe you can if you're off kilter and you're not doing things in alignment with how you need to deal with them.

Michelle Deering 10:33
Actually, I just wrote that, made reference to that in something I was writing yesterday for the presentation I'm about to do. So kudos to you.

Gresham Harkless 10:42
Thank you. I have to tell myself all the time, you know, to make sure to do that because, you know, you want to make sure that you give on a great level, but you have to, you know, make sure that oxygen mask is on first. So I appreciate you for sharing that with us and reminding us of that.

And now I wanted to ask you for what I call a CEO nugget, and this is a word of wisdom or a piece of advice, or if you can hop into a time machine, what would you tell your younger business self?

Michelle Deering 11:06
What I would tell, yeah, I tell myself a lot of things, but there are actually two things that come to mind. One is, remember who you are. And I use that word you as your own uniqueness and really just stay true to that.

And then the second is kind of like an addition to that would be Remember why you're doing what you're doing. We all go into whatever line of work we do, hopefully it's something that energizes us. Because if it's not, then I just encourage your listeners to pause and reboot to find that. But we all got into doing what we're doing for a reason.

And throughout, you know, on the daily grind where you're trying to make the business work, it's very easy to lose sight of that, especially when you hit a bp in the road or you're having to recalibrate or, you know, even when things are going well, you can lose sight of why it is you're doing what you're doing. And if we lose sight of that, you'll forget your customer. You know, who's the person that you're trying to help to begin with.

So, you know, remember who you are and remember why it is you're doing what you're doing. Eat those two nuggets.

Gresham Harkless 12:26
Nice. I definitely appreciate those nuggets and really because they align, you know, with your hack as well, too, because, you know, I always say when you peel back the onion of a business, sometimes you forget that they're made up of people. And we as people have, you know, things that we want, things that we crave, passions, gifts, whatever.
And being able to kind of tap into that when you're doing what you do, understanding that that is kind of like a product or byproduct of who you are as a person.

When you get that kind of perspective and understand that it helps you to make decisions, but it helps you to also understand that, hey, I'm off kilter today.

Why am I off kilter? Or this isn't where I want to go. Why am I not going the way I want to go? And you're able to kind of recalibrate, as you said.

Michelle Deering 13:05
Yeah, exactly. And it'd be surprising, especially if you have you know, folks who are working for you, it might have nothing to do with what's, but it comes across in the tone manner. And I even say, even if you're not saying anything, or if you're not, you know, if your body language is totally, you know, word.

But there's a vibe. And that will always come across. People feel it, sense it, and that's what you really need to be attending to.

Gresham Harkless 13:40
Yeah. And it goes without saying, kind of that, you know, There's everything is energy and everything is kind of vibe. So whether you are saying something, as you said, or not saying something, a lot of times you are actually saying something.

So it's a great kind of reminder. And now I wanted to ask you my absolute favorite question, which is the definition of what it means to be a CEO. And we're hoping to have different quote-unquote CEOs on this show. So, Dr. Michelle, what does being a CEO mean to you?

Michelle Deering 14:08
What a CEO means to me is being in control of how I go about serving people. So that's, if I have to smarize it, I like control. Not that I'm a control freak about it, but there's something to be said. Remember I mentioned earlier about how when I was in the one environment, things weren't resonating in terms of who I am as a person and know myself to be and how the system was dictating I needed to be.

Being a CEO means I get to set the tone and how I go about servicing folks. And that, that excites me. And that gets me up in the morning because, and especially when I'm out and about interacting and serving others, it floats my boat.

Gresham Harkless 14:52
Yeah, no, I definitely can understand that. And it floats my boat as well. Cause a lot of times I say, you know, sometimes what we're doing is we're all artists and you have a paintbrush. and you get to basically make the canvas into what you want to make it.

And if you want to change the paint, you can change the paint, but it's up to you. You have that control to be able to do that. And you know, it's great that you've been able to kind of bring that forward and do that with your clients and definitely share that with us as well. Dr. Rochelle, I truly appreciate your time.

What I wanted to do is pass you the mic just to see if there's anything additional you can let our readers and listeners know, and then of course, how best they can get ahold of

Michelle Deering 15:24
you. You can visit me at www.curativeconnections.com. I also have, you know, an at Curative Connections Facebook page. In addition to my, , , my YouTube channel, which I'll leave that in because the URL is kind of complicated.

But the actual video is Mothering Motivation Mondays, is what I put out a video every Monday morning to encourage moms along in their motherhood journey. Yeah, those are the ways in which folks can reach me. And I'll send to the other stuff.

Gresham Harkless 16:01
Yeah, absolutely. And those videos you put out on your YouTube channel?

Michelle Deering 16:05
Yes, I did.

Gresham Harkless 16:05
Okay, perfect. So we'll make sure to have all those links in the show notes. So just that you can, anybody's listening can kind of click through and see all the awesome things that you're putting down and creating.

And I hope you have a phenomenal rest of the day.

Michelle Deering 16:17
Thanks so much, Gresham. Great to be here.

Outro 16:19
Thank you for listening to the I AM CEO podcast powered by CB Nation and Blue 16 Media. Tune in next time and visit us at iamceo.co.
I AM CEO is not just a phrase, it's a community. Be sure to follow us on social media and subscribe to our podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, and everywhere you listen to podcasts.

Subscribe and leave us a five-star rating. This has been the I AM CEO podcast with Gresham Harkless Jr. Thank you for listening.